depression

Are You Starving Yourself?

So you’ve been pushing yourself all day right? Doing the things your mind tell you that you have to do when you don’t have the energy or motivation to do them and then… you see one of the thousands of lobs your higher self has been trying to send you all day. Maybe its not […]

What’s Your Non-negotiable?

I am being reminded…again…of the importance, not just importance, importance isn’t the right word. Non-negotiable Thats what I’m looking for. As someone who has been depressed and anxious and confused and lost…when I do not engage in my spiritual practices regularly,  on a good day, I’m unaffected. But when I hit a low, everything falls […]

Spiritual Breadcrumbs

I woke up this morning feeling. Every single day since the Fit for Service summit ended, I have felt a different emotion. I like to see that as detoxing and aligning. I remembered my ethos statement from months past. There was a line that said “when I need spiritual guidance, I read the Law of […]

The Fool

Whats difficult about this current phase of awareness, healing, and rebirth is that I have an audience here to witness it. I’m not just at home by myself. I’m surrounded by people. I’m active on social media. There is no where to hide. And I remember making it very hard for me to hide. My […]

My Journey to Fit for Sevice and Where I’m Headed Next

My journey of self-realization started way back when I lived in Iowa City. I was dating a man, working for an insurance company, and struggling with depression. I made a choice for me: move to Arizona and pursue my career alone. About 3 months after I moved, my boyfriend at the time broke up with […]

Depression

I’ve been feeling depressed for about 2 weeks. ●Why am I depressed? Self-generated lack of clarityLack of control over fear-slanging ego who says I am not enough and don’t have enough ●What does being depressed look like (for me)?Avoiding emotions through foodOversized portions + comfort foodNot talking to people (hermit mode)Not taking care of personal […]

Moving Through Depression

Today, I was happy. I woke up with a pit in my stomach. A souring void of a pit. My throat burned in silence. So I talked about itI read my ethosI ate breakfastI took a napI pleasured myselfI did and gave the gift of a yoga sessionI recieved the gift of cherries, strawberries, plums, […]

This is the first line of my personal ethos.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀It reminds me why I’m roadtripping while technically homeless, and jobless.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀In the face of heart-pounding anxiety, I see the work.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀When I’m trapped in the mirrors of trauma of my mind on a mushroom trip, I smile and laugh with gratitude. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀What is it all for…this life…if not […]

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